An ode to anger

Ah, anger,

Irritation that makes the tongue lash out where it might otherwise be held still and useless.  That magic little quirk in the mind that lets me find annoyance in things that I’d otherwise forget.  You’re the glue that helps me cling to those grievances that might get lost in the shuffle if I’m careless.

That temper you provide, I put to such good use.  How else could I blame, condemn, seek vengeance for things I’ve been guilty of myself?  Where would be the fun? You give me freedom to escape a sense of justice or fairness.  To hell with hypocrisy! Hallelujah! That meddlesome conscience cannot hold me now.  I’m in a mood! Let me be!

You’re the corkscrew that gives those awesome explosions when I’ve bottled up all I can until it can’t be contained.  What a glorious shower of verbal shrapnel can ensue and make minced meat of another’s heart.  That evil laugh must surely be emanating from elsewhere beyond my own throat.  No matter.

You give me courage to speak when I cannot think straight.  How awful it would be to lie idle in impotence when there’s a wrong that the world must know about and the perpetrator made to pay. Can I just sit there with my teeth in my mouth when you give me so much passion?

To stew, with you, even after it’s all through

How good it feels to simmer for hours or days when I might let it drop without your steady hand.   I don’t need to sleep when I have you for company, by my side day and night, leading me through silliness and folly with a focus that filters out distractions for me, so that I don’t get caught up in daily life and miss my mission’s fruition.  To inflict at least as much damage as has been done to me.  It’s my right! I will have my day!

Oh, my friend, I would never give you up, come hell or high blood pressure, for surely I would…  I would….

Do some good? Make the world a better place? Lift up others instead of cast them down? Mend hearts and relationships instead of tear asunder? Be happier and healthier? But that’s so hard, and you’re so easy.  That’s why I liked you.

Yet, I will not miss you.

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First impressions (are often wrong)

The first time I waited on an older red-haired lady at work, I hated her.  She was fussy and impatient.  I saw her talking to my manager afterward and assumed she was complaining about me.  I thought she was a real bitch, and wrote her off in my head.

The next time I waited on her she was polite but cool towards me.  I responded in kind.  It went like that for several encounters.  Then one time she greeted me a little less coldly.  I thought to myself that maybe she just was having a bad day the first time I met her.  I tried to be a little more attentive.  She seemed to get it.

Then she was talking to someone else about voting.  (It was near election time last year.)  The conversation had turned to how expensive everthing is getting and she said that she’s on social security since she’s retired and how it’s hard to get by on that.  She ended up saying to vote Democratic so we don’t lose any more.  Since I’m progressive, I was in total agreement.  I let her know I agreed and the next time I saw her we made more friendly conversation.  Since then, we’ve had many more good conversations, including our dislike of antibacterial products and how they aren’t good for you.  A person needs to be exposed to germs to keep your immune system strong.  Plus, those products help create drug resistant super germs.  I commented that it’s all the marketing by companies trying to sell more antibacterial products that’s creating a society of germophobes.  She enthusiastically endorsed my observation.

So, now, whenever I wait on her, I know I’ll have an interesting conversation, if there’s time.  (We get pretty busy at ye olde dollar shop.)  I don’t know if I’d get tired of her if we hung out, but she went from a dreaded customer to a pleasant “regular”.

It makes me wonder how much we miss out on in life when we stick to our snap judgements and treat first impressions as absolutely accurate assessments of a person, written in stone, never to be reconsidered.

What if you met your potential soulmate when you were both having an off moment?  If fate allowed another meeting, as it well might, if you’re meant to be soulmates, would you be open to a fresh start?  A new encounter not based on a single previous meeting?

Of course, I’m not saying to disregard your instincts or intuition.  They often serve to protect you.  If you distrust someone, there may be reason.  I’m just saying that sometimes, this busy, varied, modern life sometimes leads to crossed signals, missed opportunities, and needless animosity.

Don’t throw caution to the wind, but do remain open to your fellow humans for at least two encounters.  You never know what might happen.